back to life

i felt so anxious to get rid of the parents so i could rush back to my life. after delivering them to other unsuspecting relatives in toronto [markham, actually. yeesh, talk about a stepford community. creepy.] i raced back here at the speed of light, as if it were a matter of life or death, as if my five days in parentland were close to irrevocably sucking me out of a blissful routine. but somewhere on the 416 - after tensely leap-frogging through bumper to bumper traffic all the way up the 401 - i asked myself this slightly depressing question: what exactly am i hurtling myself back to? cuz actually, it ain't much. to tell u the truth, that was a pretty sobering realization. not earth shattering or revelatory (i didn't cry into my icecap). but it was something. the thought was a bit numbing, actually slowing me down enough to become entranced with the beauty of the scenery, wishing i could drag my hand gently over the topography. so now that i'm back to all this, i guess i feel liberated and calm. i just have to figure out how to tackle the re-org of my life with the same fervor with which i fled my parents. i'll get right on that, in between dips in the pool. priorities.


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