scene from a mall

speaking of malls, i forgot to mention that at the end of last week, in a rare occurance, i darted into one for a quick trip to the atm. i hate malls. i really do. upon entering, i recalled why: swarms of people in all their weirdness moving unpredictably in every direction, spreading germs and malcontent, often with aggression. the whole experience can be extremely unbalancing. but that's not the point. this particular mall moment delivered me the most remarkable sight: i saw a young woman leading a man through the throngs by his crotch. i repeat, by his crotch. her left hand was clasped firmly to his button fly. can u imagine? as they came into focus while shuffling towards me, i'm sure my face revealed a delighted awe. best part was, they seemed so fucking blasse about it. wow. listen, i'm not saying that my hand doesn't enjoy travelling to such areas (however sporadically), but in front of kernels at the rideau centre? i ain't knocking it. more ass-grabbery, i say. nice gig if you can get it.